Happiness – Cindy Athey, MS, MCAP, SAP

How to Tell if You Need Better Boundaries

Depression, Happiness, Negative Thoughts, Relapse Prevention, Relationships, Self-Esteem / January 20, 2020

it's important to your mental health to set healthy boundaries — Unhealthy boundaries can increase feelings of depression, anxiety and relapses.

When people don’t set boundaries well with others, it becomes glaringly evident. They start feeling more depressed, miserable and anxious. They feel their life is filled with constant drama & chaos. Situations feel well, suffocating. Typically life is full of chaos because others are not respecting any boundaries which always causes problems and especially with mood.

not setting boundaries can cause mental health issues — Unhealthy boundary signs

If this article has found you are feeling like life sucked any fun or enjoyment out of your day, it may be because of other’s bad behaviors. It becomes evident that healthy boundaries are not being put into place.

What is a boundary

First, let’s talk about what is a boundary and why should you set them. The Webster definition of boundary is sort of complicated. There are different forms of the definition like an actual fence and the type we are going to discuss is the “unofficial rules about what should not be done; limits that define acceptable behavior.”

So healthy boundaries are being able to define acceptable behavior or conduct. Let’s talk about how you can tell if you need better boundaries in your life and then how you can start to change that.

You probably need better boundaries in your life if you feel like:

Relationships with others are exhausting & pretty dramatic
Making decisions is really, really hard for you
If you feel like you don’t feel respected, valued or heard
You worry about what other people think
You feel guilty a lot & even over little things

The benefits of setting boundaries in your life are awesome. You will start to feel better about yourself and your situation. You will have more energy. No more feeling completely drained emotionally & physically after dealing with toxic people. They are energy vampires. You will feel more independent and strong. Total win-win here.

Tips to begin to address changing and setting healthy boundaries in your life

Talking to a counselor may help you discover why you have been accepting bad behaviors from others & where this began (hint: typically, in childhood)
Sitting by yourself identifying core values & beliefs
- (example: treat others how you want to be treated)
Create a journal list of 5 non-negotiable standards of behavior that you will & will not accept from others
Work on feeling more confident and building your self-esteem

BTW as you start putting healthy boundaries or these standards of conduct that you will accept into your life into place, be prepared. The toxic, unhealthy people’s behaviors will get worse before it gets better and they will act out because they are not getting their way. Typically by manipulating, bullying or intimidating you. Think of these behaviors as an adult size temper tantrum because that is what it is.

It’s perfectly ok to stick with your boundaries, your stress will actually decrease. The toxic person is being forced to comply with your boundaries in order to interact with you. Guess what and if they don’t oh well- they will exit your life. Remember you are making them respect you and your boundaries. It’s so truly empowering!

For some help with this

As you can tell, most of the tips to start changing the situation will need some help from a counselor but you know what at least you can identify if you do in fact have an issue with healthy boundary setting and that’s a great start.

If you are still unsure if you have a problem with boundaries, please feel free to reach out to me at (727) 815-6017 or check out book a session if you would like to talk about your situation in a session. I can help you figure out if this is a problem in your life and suggest the next step for you to start to change this.

To learn more about me, check out my LinkedIn profile

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Lions & Tigers & Anxiety – Oh My

Anxiety, Depression, Happiness, Negative Thoughts, Problem Solving, Self-Esteem / September 12, 2019

Lions, tigers and anxiety oh my — Anxiety can truly be a bear at times 🙁

About anxiety

Ugh…. yes it can feel like a bear if we let it. I have never met a person who does not feel anxious from time to time and sometimes anxiety can be unrelenting if you let it.

I find that I meet many people feel crippled because of it. People that are not enjoying their lives. People that are stuck in their homes. They are calling off work, not going to school and basically spending their days miserable.

Also I like to say anxiety typically goes with depression like peanut butter and jelly. PB & J has always been one of my favs 😊 but when we look at anxiety, depression is typically there also.

People that suffer from those mental health issues many times feel like anxiety is never going to go away which increases feelings of depression. The never-ending anxiety/depression hamster wheel going around and around…. Exhausting.

Tip to Alleviate Anxiety

That is why I decided to share my one awesome tip to alleviate anxiety and will reduce feelings of depression. It may not make it go away entirely or immediately but I can pretty much guarantee with practice this skill will help you manage anxiety so it does not keep you stuck.

Also PSA I am not a psychiatrist nor do I play one on tv so this is helpful advice only and does not replace consulting with your medical or mental health provider.

Most Awesome Anxiety Reducing Tip Ever

Find freedom from anxiety — Practice the following anxiety reducing tip and feel the freedom

The most effective tip to reduce anxiety IMHO is not Xanax or Klonopin (although these medications have proven to be helpful but I’m not a medication provider and as an addiction counselor can see how these medications can increase one’s dependency on medications – I’m more a natural approach kind of girl.

Plus some of those medications have side effects that can make you tired and who wants that) So I know you are thinking what do I do then?

It basically boils down to control. People are miserable when they try to control things that are outside of their control. Anxiety and depression for that matter can really ramp up when we try to control things that are outside of our circle of control. Also this can increase the risk of any type of relapse.

Circle of Control

So what types of things am I talking about? Other people’s behaviors, words, attitudes as well as circumstances. For example someone is rude to you, the car breaks down, the kids are sick or there are work policies/procedures that you can’t change.

When you sit and think about why you feel anxious and what is causing it. I can pretty much guarantee it (the worry or thought about the worry) is outside of your control.

Ok so what is inside of your circle of control: your thoughts, behaviors, attitudes and that my friend, is the key to reducing or stopping anxiety all together.

Freedom from anxiety is letting go of things outside of your control — Let go of what is outside of your control

Let’s try some examples:

Situation Example: I’m feeling anxious because I feel I am going to be late to a very important meeting. I live in Fl (land of traffic jams & oh so many red lights 😉 ). I am driving in my car and feel my anxiety creeping up in my chest.

So to manage it, I take a deep breath (a breathe in and count to 3, hold the breath for 3 and breathe out and count to 3 type and talk to myself by saying “Ok am I in control of this traffic? Can I jump over cars to get to the meeting quicker? No of course not. So I guess I will listen to my radio and realize I will get there when I get there.” Next time to alleviate any anxiety, I will plan to leave a bit earlier to account for any possible traffic jams.

Other People Example: I’m feeling anxious because when I am around Dan he makes me feel nervous. To challenge this type of anxiety with another person examine your inner thought life. People get anxious around other people when they do not feel confident in themselves.

Some of the negative thoughts I may have for this example “I’m not as good as Dan. I’m not as smart as Dan. “ To correct this thinking, here is a skill that works. Inner thought: “I’m am the best Cindy I can be. Dan puts his pants on the same way I do. He is no better than me so who cares what he thinks about me. I’m just as good as he is.”

When you examine the situation or your thoughts in this manner you take the pressure off which typically causes anxiety to decrease as well as depression. You are letting go of people’s views or situations that are outside of your control.

Letting it go

It’s all about looking at the situation or the other person logically and not emotionally. Logically can you change traffic or someone else’s thoughts…..Nope so let it go. This skill takes practice and you won’t get it all the time but with time you will see you can manage any anxiety easier and it will leave your body & mind quicker without the use of medication.

You can beat anxiety — Love this quote from the Wizard of Oz ( I used to hang it on my fridge for motivation)

So comment below if you’ve tried this strategy for anxiety. How did it help? What did you do? What was the anxiety about? Also if you are struggling with anxiety or have questions about it, please comment below or email me at cdathey9@gmail.com.

You can also click the link to book a free 15 min recovery journey strategy call

To learn more about me, check out my LinkedIn profile

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Is Codependency Negatively Effecting You

Addiction, Happiness, Negative Thoughts, Relapse Prevention, Relationships, Self-Care / April 15, 2019

Codependency is a well-known term used in the mental health arena. It is defined as a pattern of dependency of habitual actions based on the approval of others in an effort to find a sense of self-worth, validation, protection and personal identity.

Codependency can be complicated in that one may not be aware of it or if they are, in denial about the extent of the issue. This can negatively affect a recovery as one is not making themselves a priority which in recovery is paramount to healing and moving forward.

Here are signs that codependency is negatively effecting your recovery.

Trying to “Fix” or Help Others

As an addiction counselor, I meet many people that are involved in relationships in which they are the care takers and trying to help or change other people’s behaviors/values/attitudes. They minimize these issues and want to “fix” the other person. This is impossible as the only person who can elicit a change is the person who is changing themselves. If the other person who is displaying unacceptable behaviors is not willing to address those behaviors, then it is outside of your control.

2. Difficulty Saying No

Have you ever been asked to do something for someone else and your gut or thoughts are saying no but you go ahead and do it anyways? This is an example when people do not have strong healthy boundaries. It’s hard to say no to others especially if you want to please others but realistically in recovery you must focus on yourself and listen to your intuition. If it appears like the request should be a “no”, then it more than likely should be a “no.”

If the other person gets upset, which typically they will at first when you start setting healthy boundaries, stick to your principles and they will respect you for that later. If they don’t then they are a manipulator and it’s time to cut ties with that person because they will at some point increase your risk of relapse.

3. Believe Self-Care is Selfish

This one is tough for people new to recovery because they truly have been led to believe that it is selfish to put themselves first. Don’t believe the lies. The people that have told you that you are the selfish ones and the manipulators in your life.

Self-care is mandatory and essential to a strong recovery. For years during your addiction, you did not take care of yourself. Remember if your mind, body and soul are not healthy it is easier to relapse down that slippery slope whether that be substances or mental health issues.

4. Feel Bad Asking for Help

Recovery from anything is not for the faint at heart. It’s hard and no one knows more than me, but you have to dig deep and ask for help. There are professionals as well as support groups that can help you along the way. (check out the resources page for free support groups) It’s ok to ask for help when you need it. We all need help from others from time to time that is part of being human.

5. Feel Uncomfortable Talking to People in Authority

This comes back to effective communication and confidence. People in places of authority whether it be the legal system, physicians or even the family matriarch will respect you if you communicate your wants and needs effectively. Acknowledge the uncomfortable feeling and remind yourself that everyone is a person like you or me. We all put our pants on the same way.

Building confidence takes one step at a time but you have to practice it even if you do not feel confident at the time. Authority figures can intimidate anyone but typically relationships boil down to respect. In that I mean if you show respect to someone else they typically will mirror that back to you. If they don’t, that’s ok it just shows they have work to do on themselves.

6. Not Liking Being Alone

In recovery, you need to develop the skill of being alone at times as that is where real personal growth occurs. It’s an exciting time actually. When you are alone, it’s a break from the world where you can dream, set goals for whatever you would like and not have to worry about anyone else’s comments or opinions.

It’s truly a blessing to like being with yourself because there is nothing worse than be in a crowded room around others and feeling alone. If you are in recovery, I know you know that feeling. Embrace alone time and use it to journal and plan your exciting future of being alcohol and drug free or even toxic relationship free. Alone time is really a blessing and not a curse.

7. Can’t Leave a Relationship Even If It’s Unhealthy

I saved this one for last on the list because I figure if you have read down to number 7 it’s about that time to discuss the number one reason people relapse and that is inability to manage stress which is mostly caused by dysfunctional relationships.

Most of these relationships have been in your life for some time maybe even years. However, in the essence of self-preservation because recovery is about saving your life (physical and mental health), one must examine their personal and sometimes professional relationships.

If the relationship is unhealthy, you already know that, and it can be scary to leave the known whether bad for you or not and go into the unknown. Change is scary at times.

Codependency Recovery

With that being said, to be successful in recovery, unhealthy relationships need to leave your life or at the very least have very minimal contact in your life. At times, we outgrow people we know or are in a relationship with and that is ok. Some people are only meant to be in our lives for a season not a lifetime.

There are other signs of codependency that have not been discussed in this article. However, I chose to discuss the ones that I see most frequently in my counseling practice.

If you recognize these signs in your own life, it would be my recommendation to pursue counseling to identify strategies that you can utilize to help you move away of a life of codependency and into a peaceful life of independence. You have been a prisoner too long to this.

Being able to clearly identify these negative actions or mindsets will help you to be able to increase your sense of self-worth and move forward to freedom and peace which is what everyone truly deserves.

If you need some help identifying codependency, click this link to schedule your free 15 min recovery journey call

If you want to learn more about me, check out my LinkedIn profile

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Finding Happiness – It’s Not as Impossible as You Think

Addiction, Anxiety, Depression, Happiness, Relapse Prevention, Relationships / January 20, 2019

When I meet with client’s that are early in recovery from substance abuse or mental health issues, the main topic or goal that they typically want help with is finding happiness. Tall order, right? Well yes, but really not as elusive as you might think. Happiness can be achieved, and I wouldn’t be saying that if I didn’t get there myself.

Happiness which is defined by Webster as the “state of well-being and contentment” can feel overwhelmingly unachievable to some because they feel so miserable, sad, overwhelmed, stressed out and well, just plain overwhelmed in their life presently. There are ways you can find true contented happiness and it really isn’t that difficult to do but it does take some work on your part.

Stay in the Moment

The only part of your life that you can truly change is this present moment. You cannot change the past and you really can’t predict the future, not totally anyways. It all depends on what you are doing now in the present moment.

A way to find contentment is being content in the present moment. Will you ever feel bad? Of course, you will but you are truly the only one who can change that reality as you are the only one who can elicit changes in your life or reality as you perceive it.

For example, if I am having a bad day, you know the type because we all have them from time to time in which you really want a do-over because everything that can go wrong has gone wrong, embrace it, laugh it off and push through it.

Guess what? In 24 hours that day will have gone by and you will be in the next day – essentially your do-over. So during the rough day, take a deep breath and persevere. It will get better but you have to get your mindset that way.

Be OK with Being by Yourself

Many people are afraid of being alone. I am talking about the people who are not in a relationship or perhaps the empty nesters where the kids are out of the house on their own. Many people I speak with do not like being by themselves which can make someone feel more depressed, more apt to relapse (mentally or physically) and that’s not good.

People are fearful of being by themselves because they are bored or lonely. Embrace your alone time. Get reconnected with yourself during this period because this is only a period and apt to change. Do things that you enjoy or used to enjoy by yourself. Journal about your feelings. If you don’t like being alone, google clubs or groups in your area that have get-togethers that interest you and then attend one.

Alone time is a gift because it lets you de-stress, have some down time from interactions with others that can negatively effect your mood. Ever be around toxic people that drag down your mood? Yes, I have and to be honest I’d rather be alone napping or reading a great book or something than being with the negative people who mentally drain me.

Look for the Positives Even in the Negatives

So remember for every positive there is a negative and in turn every negative has a positive if you look for it. Went through a bad relationship break-up? I’m sure if you look at the relationship as a whole there were some good times and some bad times.

Find the lesson in that negative, there is one. It could be you did not stand up for yourself and were manipulated. It could be just not a good fit but you were lonely and jumped into it. Whatever the lesson figure it out so it doesn’t get repeated and form more negative stress in your life.

Life is great at repeating the lesson if it is not learned. So while you are having that alone time, identify what are the lessons? What are the positive takeaways from the experience? They are there. Commit to yourself that you will not repeat the lessons and check those off the list of learned.

If you find you try these and nothing gets better, you may want to seek out counseling to help you with this. But as you know, Rome wasn’t built in a day so give them a real chance to work. You will see positive changes and I am only saying that as one previous negative thinker who was able to change my view to embrace a state of well being and contentment aka happiness. I can honestly say that it took some work to overcome past darkness but it can be done with concentrated effort.

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The Miracle that Comes after a Relationship Meltdown

Happiness, Problem Solving, Relationships, Self-Esteem / August 20, 2018

Has your confidence ever been down or seems to not exist lately and especially after a break up or relationship meltdown? You know you feel like you can’t do anything right and especially after an important relationship in your life comes to a crashing end where you feel like the rug has totally, completely been pulled out from under you.

Well no worries, I have a way that will help you make better decisions next time cupid rolls into town as well as eliminate the low self-esteem, inner negative self-talk and low confidence that happens after a toxic relationship has ended.

People are all human and going to make mistakes, you are, I am and even the person you trusted and thought was “the one, your everything” will make mistakes. It’s just human nature. No one is perfect and one needs to accept that fact. Sometimes relationships don’t work out for many reasons such as the other person isn’t ready for one, you aren’t ready for one or it’s just fate, you two are not good together and that is what I am calling a relationship meltdown.

Stop Living in the Past

I have learned you can’t remain in the past of the should have’s, would have’s or could have’s. It’s not healthy for you. One needs to accept the relationship ended, and if you’re reading this post it probably ended not in a good way, but the point is you need to continue to move forward.

Don’t get stuck in blaming yourself, the other person or just life in general. Life doesn’t suck, everything will be ok and it is what it is. The main point is to make sure you continue to move on, move forward even a baby step at a time but just forward and not backwards, stuck in the past.

I speak with people all the time who are stuck in the past and it’s sad…oh so sad. These people are dwelling on irrational thoughts of a failed relationship. They continue to stare at the relationship as if it was a Cinderella story when in fact it was closer to Kim and Kanye, a relationship meltdown. Yeah, a hot mess.

Use Your Inner Magnifying Glass

When examining why a relationship went bad, it is extremely important not to romanticize it and view it realistically. There were clues it wasn’t going right. Come on you saw it didn’t you? They were pretty neon bright, right? Your gut or intuition was probably telling you all along something wasn’t right. In a good relationship, you don’t have to try so hard. It should not be painful or at the very least feel like you are putting more into it than the other person.

So here’s the part how you can get your head back in the game and the way to do that is to identify the pattern. There is always a pattern. By that I mean a pattern of issues which you can see if you look closely enough at yourself. Yes, I said yourself and not the other person.

I know that blows because who wants to admit they were part of an unhealthy relationship. But seriously I did it and it became quite clear that for me, it boiled down to low self-esteem, insecurity, dreaded self-hate or sabotage.

In each of these relationships, my own inner guide or intuition told me “don’t do it, it doesn’t feel right” but then that darn emotional “I wanna be loved” voice started talking and it all seemed well romantic.

Anyways once I grasped the part of what my own inner issues were, I could see where the relationships were not right to begin with and the funny thing is I knew that the whole time. The relationships were completely built out of insecurity, anxiety, perfectionism, my own inner character flaws.

So……Drop the Resentment and Bitterness

Anyways for a while I blamed the guy because any ending relationship stings. It hurts and you get knocked down off the confidence ladder but once I determined the underlying theme of the guys, got rid of the resentments towards them and came to terms with the “It is what it is” or more so “they are who they are” of the situation (reality) and person. I found I was ok with the lessons I learned because they are lessons….life lessons that made me the stronger person I am today.

I learned that I would be just fine. I learned to always listen to my gut (intuition) and of course look at the pattern because there always is one. Yeah the guy or girl may not look the same as the last one but down deep there are similarities in thoughts, actions and themes. If you look with your inner magnifying glass it will be crystal clear at some point and that is very enlightening and helpful.

Finally if you need help in this area, please reach out to me. Sometimes it is just good to hear an impartial point of view on a situation.

Need some help, click this link to book a free 15 min recovery strategy call and let’s talk about it.

You can learn more about me on my LinkedIn profile

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The Secret of Why Your Life Is Like a Fish tank

Anxiety, Depression, Happiness, Negative Thoughts, Self-Esteem / July 17, 2018

I was reading a book by Joyce Meyer recently (see below) and just completed it the other night. A super quick read which I totally love when I like a book enough to blast through it. Anyways part of my relaxation/sleep routine is read a few pages before bedtime. It helps me get in the chill zone.

There was an analogy in the book about life being like a fish tank. I wanted to share this insight with you because actually it has been helpful to me and one of those “Ahhhhh” moments in my life. 🙂

In the book and I’m totally paraphrasing but the main point was look at your life like a fish tank. It will reflect how healthy you are.

So here is an exercise:

Shut your eyes and think of a big fish tank, you know the 50 gallon type that are typically in the Doctor’s office what do you see?

I see beautiful clear water with bubbles, all types of bright, vibrant colored fish swimming around, cool tank décor and then lots of healthy looking plants. It looks peaceful and relaxing. Do you see that? Can you hear the sound? I sure do and love looking at tanks like this.

Now at the opposite end of the spectrum is the sick fish tank ☹. How can you tell that tank is sick and has not been maintained or is overall doing poorly? The tank has cloudy water, algae on the glass and all over the tank. The fish are floating belly up or not really moving around and hanging out on the bottom of the tank barely moving. Can you picture that? I can….it looks sick and unkempt.

In the same way, our life or environment which is a main contributor to our mental health and moods are like a fish tank. It takes a bit of work to maintain a fish tank in good working order and guess what the same goes for you and your mental health.

In a healthy fish tank, the water temperature and quality need to be right. It’s a fine balance. There also needs to be compatible fish in the tank.

When a fish tank is not in balance, what happens? The fish fight and don’t survive (sometimes somebody eats the other ☹ ☹ ). It’s quite a struggle.

In the same way, when life becomes unbalanced whether it’s having toxic, unsupportive people around you and the self-care slips, it causes a problem to your mind, body and spirit. Depression, anxiety and stress can become overwhelming.

However, when one identifies underlying issues like dysfunctional relationships, puts themselves as the priority and corrects negative mindsets, they become happier and stress well when it occurs is easily handled.

So my question to you is how is your tank???? Is it beautiful and relaxing or sick and unkempt?

Here are some questions to ask yourself about your own situation?

Is your home or work environment peaceful, inviting and relaxing or messy, stressful and dirty?
What are the state of your relationships? Are they supportive and fun or toxic and demotivating?
Do you take care of yourself or do you find yourself not having enough time for that in your day?

Answering these questions will help you be able to determine what can be tweaked so that you are happier and less depressed or anxious.

Sooooo let me know in the comments below what you discovered.

If you need some help with managing stress and self-care, click here to book a free 15 min recovery journey call

To learn more about me check out my LinkedIn profile

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My Top 5 Self Help Reads to Increase Happiness! Number 3 Is My Favorite

Anxiety, Depression, Happiness, Negative Thoughts / June 19, 2018

Keeping a positive mindset when life gets tough can be difficult to say the least. I’ve always been an avid reader. It helps me relax as well as learn new things but mostly it keeps my mind in a glass half full kinda way.

I love books, real books not e-books so I’m one that has a huge collection. I know I will always be that way. I wanted to share what I have learned and below is my list of top 5 books that I have enjoyed, learned a bunch from and well, kept me moving forward positively I might add over the past few years.

Also as a little PS in the disclaimer dept, since I’m such a Prime junkie 😉 and order all the time from Amazon for books. I became an affiliate, so these book links are affiliate links which means if you do choose to get one of these books, we both win. No pressure but I think you will find them useful to you and that’s why I want to share what I found there.

1) 52 Ways to Live a Kick-Ass Life by Andrea Owen

This book was one big game changer for me and helped me embrace my inner bad-ass. 😊 The author discusses 52 ways to change your life and for the good. It’s a quick read or the type once you’re into it, you can’t put it down. When I need a quick confidence boost, I reach for this. Andrea did hit the mark with this book. It addresses confidence, finding peace, relationship issues and low self esteem in a straight forward no BS type of way. Totally one of my favs!

2) Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers by Karyl McBride, Ph.D.

This book is helpful in learning how to cope with your own thoughts as well as current or past dysfunctional relationship with your mother. I’m not going to lie not all relationships between mother’s and daughter’s are wonderful.

This book really delves into the ways growing up in this type of family dynamic can affect your entire life from work, relationships and yes, even how you parent. I think there is just not enough resources on this very subject matter. If you have ever felt frustrated or said to yourself, “I don’t get it. It’s never good enough” this may be the book to check out.

3) Embrace Your Magnificence by Fabienne Frederickson

This book is inspiring and also one that I highly recommend. I found that I read it and then kept going back to it when I am feeling depressed and not confident about myself.

Fabienne hits the mark in talking about changing one’s view of oneself and embracing the magnificence that we all have. She breaks it down into easy to read chapters about forgiving yourself and others, trusting yourself and reaching beyond fear and resistance. It was recommended by a lovely business coach and it is truly another one of my all time favs.

4) Codependency for Dummies by Darlene Lancer, MFT

This book has been another game changer in my life after a few failed attempts at successful relationships. I found it helpful to be able to identify unhealthy thinking patterns in my own life. Plus I love all the Dummies genre type books because well they keep it simple and that is how I tend to understand things better.

Also what is great about this book is that it breaks down the whole codependency deal by explaining it in depth, helping you discover if you are truly codependent in relationships and if so, how you got that way as well as teaching you skills to leave that in the past and move forward to healthier relationships with others. Total game changer 😉

5) You’re Not Crazy – It’s Your Mother (Understanding and healing for daughters of narcissistic mothers) by Danu Morrigan

Ok I’m not gonna lie…..what totally initially drew my attention to this book was the title!!! 😉 Love it!! and if you have struggled at times in a relationship with your mother, I think you are going to like this book too.

This is another good and helpful resource that discusses difficult relationships between a narcissistic mother and her daughter. I found it extremely helpful for my own life as many times I did not understand my relationship with my mother. I was doubtful of my own impressions of conversations/interactions with her. This book helps by discussing the issue as well as how to heal from the effects of the relationship. I highly recommend this book also.

So that rounds out my current top 5 list of reads that will help increase your happiness. Yes, it is actually getting down to the nitty gritty and looking at parts of yourself that perhaps you don’t want to but I have found to be happy you truly do need to look and then address that ugly stuff.

These resources are all super reasonably priced and to me they are certainly super worthy of so much more. They have helped me personally as well as help me help others who are hurting. Check them out 🙂

Also leave your top self-help reads in the comments below. I’m always looking for a great new book to read. 🙂

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